It was in the news that Reggie, the renegade L.A. alligator was captured, yesterday at Lake Machado.
What's interesting is that some of the folks in on the capture weren't sure if they had the right reptile. The animal was bigger than they expected, so some wondered if it could be another gator.
I guess they figured it wouldn't grow that fast.
In any event, the critter is being held at the L.A. zoo, pending a decision as to his ultimate fate. I've come up with a few possibilities:
a) Send him or her (the sex hasn't yet been determined) to Mexico, where they'll turn the hide into handbags and boots. But before you do that, you may want liquidate the alligator and feature the meat as the prime ingredient on a special pay-per-view edition of the Iron Chef (proceeds going to fight brush fires).
b) Send Reggie to UCLA, so that can adopt him/her as their new mascot. Since the Bruins got their asses whipped twice in the past 2 NCAA basketball tournaments by the Florida Gators, they might as well adopt the champion's mascot. (As the saying goes, "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em!")
c) Send Reggie to San Francisco State Univ., since their mascot is already the Gator. They can stick it in Lake Merced, which is next to campus.
d) Send it to Harbor community college, which is very close Reggie's hideout (Lake Machado). Since the gator had been adopted as a second mascot (the first being the "Seahawk"), they oughta put it in a special pool at the school. It's time to cash in on the critter and start a new certificate program -- alligator wrestling. (Freddie Blassie would approve, but the WWE might not!)
Think of the final exam when that baby gets to be a full size adult of 13+ feet long!